Many articles talk about giving timely and specific feedback to others by using recent examples and conveying actionable points. It is highlighted often that feedback is a gift. However, a thing that is talked about less often is understanding whether it is the right time to give someone feedback.

I was thinking about a few times I gave "timely" feedback to someone who was not in the mental state to receive it. Consequently, neither the person receiving the feedback nor I - the person giving the feedback, left the conversation feeling heard or motivated to focus on some improvement opportunities.

In a recent discussion at work, one of my colleagues highlighted the importance of understanding whether it is a good time to give feedback and mentioned HALT. HALT stands for hungry, angry, lonely and tired. If the person you want to give feedback to is hungry, angry, lonely or tired, it is not going to be a good time to have that discussion. Similarly, if you are hungry, angry, lonely or tired, you may not be in a position to convey your feedback effectively.

Before having a conversation to convey some feedback, a quick check to understand how you are feeling is useful. Also, it's important to understand whether the person you want to talk to is in a state to listen to the feedback. Doing these could save us a lot of frustration, time and energy and it will help us have good conversations that focus on actions.